While in the corner of existence we try to understand our defiance. The defiance that stops us from turning into the darkness that we see everyday. The darkness that surrounds so many in our lives. The corruption that creates the darkness is so easily followed, so easily created; and while we no longer fear it, we float just on its edges. Only to never graps at it. The taste of this corruption forever lingers on our soul, as a stain that can never be removed, but only looked upon with remorse. While we acknowledge the darkness that envelopes so many, we can only look forward into what can be described as against the grain. Whilst moving against the grain, all we can do is hold true and remember the stains on our soul, and the reasoning for this clear vision.
For all the worth, for all the meaning, we find ourselves looking for something to mask any void we consider our existence has. Chaos ensure that any step taken without fault is balanced through corruption. Collective consciousness forms when parallels between chaos and corruption are desired, when the human instinct of self-destruction prevails without question. With the desire for chaos surrounding every action and reaction, risks are taken, attitudes are darkened and morals are lost. Falling into anarchy we can only watch on until we chose to step out of the collective, to move against the grain.
We drift ever so slowly through this life, feeling, creating, expiring. Drawing upon every notion of experience, learning from every ounce of action and reaction, sensing perfection: but why? to simply become better or to displace anathema within our soul? This drive provides an enigma in social existence for it only seeks the correction and amplification of learning through animosity towards our own faults. Finding ourselves between two worlds; the plane of existence and the depth of reality that entwines the corruption and energy of existence itself. Striving to achieve fulfillment of our soul, we attempt to bridge the gap between existence and the energies that fill our anima: more so often does it become compensation rather than perfection.
Striving forward with one goal in mind, one objective in sight fought for so long, extending the limits, never giving up and never letting go; all else is secondary. We ignore the secondary for so long it becomes too bottled, these small sacrifices as we convince ourselves will be fine, slowly eating away at whatever is left. When we try to step back from it all – to relax, to unwind – we find ourselves nothing but undone.
Sometimes we let ourselves get so exhausted, physically, emotionally and mentally, that we forget what is most important. We over analyze, and see everything worse than it actually is. Sometimes we get so far beyond what actually is, that we start to become self-destructive, making everything just as bad as what we think it is. Forcing the reality to match the sad illusion we have ourselves believe. In doing so, we hurt the people we care about, the people we want to hold close.
We live in a world each unto its own,
where the reality is based on our perceptions and what we choose to accept.
This reality is also bound by what we are told; the ‘facts’.
However these facts are fickle and are easily distorted.
Everything we believe and accept are driven by our emotions,
which are as fickle as the chemicals that produce them.
We build our beliefs on our reality, and as our view of reality changes, so do our beliefs.
This is all well and good until your realise and accept the wider reality.
When the integrity of others does not match your own,
and neither do the altruistic feelings.
Sometimes our reality changes for a brief moment,
triggered by something we believe is true,
generally told by someone else,
with it having a large impact on your reality.
And for that brief moment there is hope until the real truth be told or circumstances change.
At this point you do not know what to say or believe, but nothing changes the destroyed hope.
At times we can no longer find a reason for living or a point to our lives.
However, there is always a reason to continue on in life,
in dark times it is usually blinded or hidden under the emotion,
hurt and sadness that suffocates our thoughts.
Life is continually moving forward, changing and shaping who we are.
Life is always throwing problems at us,
we deal with them on a day to day basis,
though at times we are overwhelmed by these problems.
It is how we deal with and bounce back from life’s problems,
that defines who we are.
We may lose the one we love or just simply feel overpowered by life itself.
But as some doors close, others open.
We need to overcome our problems and prevail:
before the ‘now’- open doors become closed.
Life never stops moving forward, and we need to keep moving forward with it.
We can love people who don’t love us in return,
people can disregard who we are;
but can we allow others to interfere with our lives so much,
that we stop it for them?
Life isn’t fair, but you can always overcome its challenges.
Life is never comprised of nothing,
we will always have feelings, friends,
happiness and a reason for living.
The world is a big place, so is life: