While in the corner of existence we try to understand our defiance. The defiance that stops us from turning into the darkness that we see everyday. The darkness that surrounds so many in our lives. The corruption that creates the darkness is so easily followed, so easily created; and while we no longer fear it, we float just on its edges. Only to never graps at it. The taste of this corruption forever lingers on our soul, as a stain that can never be removed, but only looked upon with remorse. While we acknowledge the darkness that envelopes so many, we can only look forward into what can be described as against the grain. Whilst moving against the grain, all we can do is hold true and remember the stains on our soul, and the reasoning for this clear vision.

The name is from the French, Gargoeui. The name of a medieval dragon that prowled the river Seine. Whose horrible image became the symbol of the soul of the condemned. Turned to stone. Or of the devils and demons of the underworld spared eternal damnation.

The embodiment of the lesser forces of the universe who inspired dread, the threat of our own damnation. Ushers into hell or into the realm of our own dark fears and imagination. For over 1200 years, this grotesque image has found its expression in stone, clay, wood, oil and charcoal. Born again and again as if resurrecting itself by its own will through tortured human expression, almost as if it existed. Haunting men inwardly so that it may haunt mankind for eternity.

But what impulses moved it to kill? Could this be the same dark force at work? Its ultimate expression the destruction of the flesh? Of the very hand that creates it? Is this evil something born in each of us? Crouching in the shadow of every human soul waiting to emerge? A monster waiting to violate our bodies and twist our will to do its bidding? Is this the monster called madness?Fox Mulder – X Files

For all the worth, for all the meaning, we find ourselves looking for something to mask any void we consider our existence has. Chaos ensure that any step taken without fault is balanced through corruption. Collective consciousness forms when parallels between chaos and corruption are desired, when the human instinct of self-destruction prevails without question. With the desire for chaos surrounding every action and reaction, risks are taken, attitudes are darkened and morals are lost. Falling into anarchy we can only watch on until we chose to step out of the collective, to move against the grain.

We are but visitors on this rock, hurling through time and space at sixty-six thousand miles an hour. Tethered to a burning sphere by an invisible force and an unfathomable universe. This most of us take for granted while refusing to believe these forces have any more effect on us than a butterfly beating its wings halfway around the world. Or that two girls, born on the same date, the same time and the same place, might not find themselves the unfortunate focus of similar unseen forces. Converging like the planets themselves into burning pinpoints of cosmic energy, whose absolute gravity would threaten to swallow and consume everything in its path. Or maybe the answer lies even further from our grasp.Fox Mulder – X Files

We drift ever so slowly through this life, feeling, creating, expiring. Drawing upon every notion of experience, learning from every ounce of action and reaction, sensing perfection: but why? to simply become better or to displace anathema within our soul? This drive provides an enigma in social existence for it only seeks the correction and amplification of learning through animosity towards our own faults. Finding ourselves between two worlds; the plane of existence and the depth of reality that entwines the corruption and energy of existence itself. Striving to achieve fulfillment of our soul, we attempt to bridge the gap between existence and the energies that fill our anima: more so often does it become compensation rather than perfection.

Baltar: I see angels. Angels in this very room. I may be mad, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not right. Because there’s another force at work here; there always has been. It’s undeniable. We’ve all experienced it. Ever one in this room has witnessed events that they can’t fathom, let alone explain away by rational means. Puzzles deciphered in prophecy. Dreams given to a chosen few. Our loved ones, dead, risen. Whether we want to call that God or gods or some sublime inspiration or a divine force we can’t know or understand, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter. It’s here. It exists. And our two destiny’s are entwined in its force.

Cavil: If that’s true, and that’s a big if, how do I know that this force has our best interests in mind? How do you know that God is on your side, doctor?

Baltar: I don’t. God’s not on any one side. God’s a force of nature, beyond good and evil. Good and evil, we created those. Want to break the cycle? Break the cycle of birth, death, rebirth, destruction, escape, death. Well, that’s in our hands, and our hands only. It requires a leap of faith. It requires that we live in hope, not fear.Series Finale – Battlestar Galactica

Look, you wanna know the truth? I don’t really care about the stats, or the cup, or the trophy, or anything like that. In fact even the games aren’t that important to me, not really. What matters to me is the perfect throw. Making the perfect catch. The perfect step and block. It’s perfection. That’s what it’s about. It’s about those moments when you… when you can feel the perfection of creation. The beauty of physics, the wonder of mathematics. You know the… the elation of action and reaction. And that is the kind of perfection that I want to be connected to.Samuel T. Anders – Battlestar Galactica

Striving forward with one goal in mind, one objective in sight fought for so long, extending the limits, never giving up and never letting go; all else is secondary. We ignore the secondary for so long it becomes too bottled, these small sacrifices as we convince ourselves will be fine, slowly eating away at whatever is left. When we try to step back from it all – to relax, to unwind – we find ourselves nothing but undone.

We knew the world would not be the same. A few people laughed, a few people cried. Most people were silent. I remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita; Vishnu is trying to persuade the Prince that he should do his duty, and to impress him, takes on his multi-armed form and says, ‘Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.’ I suppose we all thought that, one way or another.J. Robert Oppenheimer (1965)

“Fear is just another word for ignorance”
“When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro”
“Freedom is something that dies unless it’s used”
“In a closed society where everybody’s guilty, the only crime is getting caught. In a world of thieves, the only final sin is stupidity.”
“You can turn your back on a person, but never turn your back on a drug, especially when its waving a razor sharp hunting knife in your eye.”
“Politics is the art of controlling your environment.”
“Never turn your back on fear. It should always be in front of you, like something that might have to be killed”Hunter S. Thompson (1971) Fear and Loathing